Monthly Archive for July, 2006

Metta-Morphosis

Published
by
Heimdall
on July 10, 2006
in Thoughts
. 2 Comments

“We say farewell so that later we can greet one another again.”

My beloved girlfriend started her letter to me with these words. It’s a recurring theme in our relationship - simple and beautiful.

Even in her absence I can learn things from her. In the past I have tried explaining to her what I knew about the brahmaviharas, and I suppose I did not understand them myself back then, but I always knew (and felt) that she “radiates” a lot of metta (loving kindness).

Now it is always easy to perceive things in my environment, but a lot more difficult to apply that kind of perception to myself. I often sense a lack of metta in people around me when they converse, even though they clearly wish to “help” each other and firmly believe in their own good will. It’s a bit like jumping immediately to karuna (caring friendship) or mudita (sympathetic joy), but forgetting about metta. Experience shows that it doesn’t work, as the principle predicts.

Yeah, and it simply doesn’t work on myself either. I do “forget” about metta very often. Usually when I perceive something in others, there is at least one instance of the same principle active within me. I just have to get used to look into the mirror with open eyes. :-)

Separation from the Loved

Published
by
Heimdall
on July 2, 2006
in News and Thoughts
. 0 Comments

It is said in the Saccavibhanga Sutta that “… separation from the loved is stressful (dukkha) …”.

Two days ago my beloved has eventually gone to India to work with her father for about three months. We have never been separated by any such distance or period before, and still I can feel her presence right here and now. I see her in the colours of the trees, I hear her in the laughter of a child, I feel her in the raindrops on my skin. And in doing so, I feel happiness rather than sadness.

Usually one would expect the experience of such a long-distance relationship as rather frightening, stressful, even painful. So it seems to me that we are living in unusual times! I am in love with her, I somehow feel “excited with her” about the things yet to come, I am happy that she is doing well … and I feel even more happiness when I remember the wonderful time that we have already shared together.

With so much reason for joy, why should I allow myself to suffer about separation in space and time? Love without clinging seems stronger. Not so much dukkha after all. :-)